Grace in Session: Continue to Choose YOU

Some of us were raised to believe that love means sacrifice—especially when it comes to family. We learned to anticipate needs, smooth over conflict, and carry burdens that were never ours to hold. And while empathy is a gift, people-pleasing can quietly erode our peace, our voice, and our God-given identity.

If you’ve ever felt stuck in your family’s pain, here’s a gentle truth: You can love others without losing yourself. You can choose peace without choosing denial. You can honor your values—even when others don’t understand them.

Rewriting the Narrative: From Guilt to Grace

Let’s shift the story from:

“I’m stuck in my family’s pain.” to: “I’m choosing to protect my peace and honor my values, even when others are hurting.”

This isn’t selfish. It’s stewardship. It’s a values-based re-authoring of your role in the family dynamic and one that reflects both emotional maturity and spiritual discernment.

The Passenger on the Bus Metaphor

Imagine your life as a bus. You’re the driver. Painful thoughts, guilt, fear, anger, are noisy passengers. They may shout directions, but they don’t get to steer.

Ask yourself: “What direction do I want to drive, even with those passengers on board?”   This is the heart of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT): choosing values-driven action, even in the presence of discomfort.

 You’re not obligated to repeat inherited narratives. Explore how past experiences shaped your beliefs and gently separate those stories from your personal values. Reflect on divine design for your life. Isaiah 61:3–4 reminds us that God rebuilds ruins and restores generations. 

 Guilt may have been your compass but it’s not your calling. Normalize the discomfort of boundary-setting and choose committed action that aligns with your values. Galatians 6:2–5 teaches balance: bear one another’s burdens, yes—but also carry your own load.

Affirmations in Practice: “I continue to choose ME. Not because I’m abandoning others—but because I’m finally honoring the person God created me to be.”

You are not selfish for setting boundaries. You are not unloving for protecting your peace. You are practicing emotional integrity—and that is holy work.

Be happy. Be well.

—Jasmine💜